#20: How to be the greatest lover of all: Be an equaliser

26 May 2010 - 10:07am Comments Off

Nah Casanova, move over!

We still need to remove some doubts before we can move on to be a lover of all.

There is no valid basis to argue that we cannot accept everyone as our mothers now because it is a past event. For those of us whose mothers have passed away, do we tell people we have no mother and lived as if she had never existed? The same holds true for all our past mothers. They are gone but yet they remain our mothers. We cannot recognise each other only because of changes in our external appearance and our lack of memory power.

There must have been many times when we cannot recall people we meet and events in the past. Yet we do not deny or reject their occurrence, existence or relationship with us. Modern day hypnotherapy or mind regression techniques however, have proven that in many cases people are able to recollect some memory of their past lives and relationships.

Not only have all beings been kind to us as our mothers, but every happiness we are experiencing now is due to the kindness of others. We came into this world with nothing but skin and bones. Our mind was a blank…even Marilyn Monroe had her radio!

Yet we receive shelter and sustenance from others even without asking. Everything we need then and now, whether for survival or pleasure, has come about through the generosity and kindness of others, past and present. Where have the clothes we wear come from? If not for someone who learnt how to sew, we would still be wearing banana leaves. Who taught us how to read? If someone did not invent the alphabet and share that with us, we would all still be illiterate. We are now surfing the world’s info channels through the Worldwide Web without moving one inch from our seat. There is no need for an arduous 5,000-mile trip to seek enlightened knowledge like the journey undertaken by the Tang dynasty monk Hsuan Tsang…and don’t forget he had to return by same way, with nothing but the Gobi Desert in between!

Nowadays, access to enlightenment and anything else we are interested in (unfortunately mostly causes of suffering) is only one click away. What’s more, this knowledge is free. Have we contributed anything to this other than complaints and ungratefulness? Let’s imagine if everyone was selfish, and charged us for the wonderful things they have created or if they did not want to share their inventions with us. What if Edison had been a show-off, and only wanted his own house to have lights? What if Fleming charged a million bucks for a dose of his penicillin and you were a dying patient? What if no one wanted to get dirty and be rubbish collectors? What would we do with money if no one produced things that tickled our fancy or made life easy for us? Where does our money come from? Our employers, our bosses. People who give us contracts, our jobs. Our money did not fall down from the sky.

Even though we make little or zero contribution to all the above facilities, they are all available for us to use. People are so kind nowadays that even if we have no money, if we are sincere and stretch out our hand, chances are someone will give us something.

We cannot develop genuine love for others if we do not appreciate their contribution to our happiness. We need others to be happy. At the moment, our hearts are hard because of our narrow and fixed views. Right now, we selfishly think all the happiness we are enjoying is due to our own efforts. We do not feel much affection for others except those who mean something to us or have benefited us. Let’s start loving everyone because they have all benefited us as our mothers, and as people who had contributed to everything we are enjoying now.

Loving everyone becomes easy if we have gratitude. It is the softener for our heart. We need to cherish others as much as we cherish ourselves. That is equalising.

NEXT: Cherishing Ourselves and Others Equally

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